Growing up, I realised that the saying ‘mum knows best’ was absolutely true. My mum knew everything and was always, always right, no question about that.
Come to think of it, we never questioned, we just did what we were told. Children today are confident, bold, want an explanation, will question everything, answer back and overall make themselves heard.
As with all mothers, I want what’s best for my children and I have tried but I still have a lot to learn. For starters I am not my mother, I couldn’t even be like her, so I am not even trying; secondly, I don’t have all the answers and I am not always right.
As parents, we need to realise that, other than instilling strong family values, it is tough to bring up children the exact same way that we were brought up.
In today’s competitive world, children too face a lot of peer pressure that can be overwhelming for them to handle.
All you can do is to nurture your children, be supportive, love them unconditionally and make them feel they are valued, thus paving the way for building a secure foundation, on which they can thrive and grow to become responsible and caring human beings.
The fact is that to some extent, we have to move with the times and adjust our mindset if we want to stay connected and build a strong relationship with our children.
Alternatively, you can force them to conform to your way of thinking and risk losing them altogether.
Furthermore, there comes a time, as painful as it is, when you have to loosen the apron strings and let go even if it hurts to watch them stumble and fall, because it is only through trial and error that they will learn how to fly.
Over time, if I have taught my children about life, I have learnt a lot from them too. If I have been right, there are many times I have been wrong and I have never hesitated to admit my mistakes. By doing so, I have taught them the importance of being accountable for their actions and not let ego blind their judgement.
Just because you are a parent, doesn’t make you perfect in any way. Just because you are a parent, doesn’t mean things have to always be your way.
Being a parent, is about respecting your children for who they are, not judging, not criticizing, not putting them down and yet letting them know who is in charge.
Be a kind, patient teacher yet teaching them right from wrong would be ineffective, if you don’t practise what you preach.
There will be times when your patience will be stretched, you will rant and rave and want to pull your hair out, but it is okay to have a meltdown, because none of us is perfect.
Children today are so much smarter than we were at their age. They are quick to learn, they know what they want and are ambitious. They have much more in terms of opportunities and material comforts and many are a pampered lot, but that's our doing, not theirs.
So although we would like to think we know best, we don't always do. I think I speak for many, when I say that being a parent can be a demanding, frustrating and thankless 24/7 job, but on the flipside, it is truly a rewarding experience.
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